Is your life turning out differently than you intended? Let’s review the obstacles that interfere with building your ideal life and learn how to change them.
Every decision you make has a tremendous effect on your future. Consider your choice of friends, for example. We spend days, years, maybe a lifetime with certain people we have accepted into our lives.
If we think about it, tracing back to who we met from whom, a friend of a friend who now became our friend, we realize that every decision had a turning point where we might have met someone else instead.
Then, from that person, we would have met different people than those we know now. We would have had a completely different life at this juncture, knowing other people in every respect.
You may not have been aware of it, but every person you know and everyone you have been in contact with affected your life in some way.
One friend may have introduced you to a new venture that you experienced, or another may have made a comment that caused you to change your decisions.
You might have had a completely different life from the one you have now; maybe better, maybe worse, maybe just something different.
I'm referring to friends as an example, but you can apply the same logic to choosing a profession, a social club you're considering joining, or even how you treat people.
Are you overlooking what's necessary to reach your desired goals? You might be confusing what you "want" with what you "need."
It will be easier to make the best choices if you recognize why your needs are important to you. It's crucial to understand the difference.
There is more to it, though. Your desires might be more important than just having them for pleasure. They could be important life plans, such as choosing a career, getting married, raising a loving family, or buying a house.
So, which is it? Are they needs or wants?
When I have a major problem to resolve, I sit in a comfortable chair in my living room (I call it my thinking chair) and contemplate the situation to figure out a solution.
It's funny, but I always get good ideas in that chair. I'm sure it's because I gave the issue my attention and thought it through.
How often do you think things through? Do you envision the outcome? Do you feel a sense of purpose? Try it and see what you come up with. I'll give you some guidance to help you get there.
While contemplating any decision, ask yourself, “What’s the point?” That will help you focus on the purpose of your decision so you won’t waste time with the wrong choice.
We go through life always choosing one thing or another. Whatever we do, we are eliminating all other possibilities — yet some of those options may have been better.
So, always consider if you are doing something meaningful that leads to the purpose you truly want to accomplish.
Many of us have made poor decisions that we later regret. I know I have. Many are minor and inconsequential. However, others may have been life-changing.
We make mistakes in judgment when lacking information. That happens when we don't do effective research to get the required information.
Poor decisions can last a lifetime, but no matter where you are in your life, you can try to change course.
It helps to understand that while you are involved in any endeavor, you are missing out on other things you could be doing. So, you need to determine if your choices indeed have value to you.
When you realize you made a wrong choice that affects your future, accept it, and make it work, or change it. Let go of past mistakes and learn from them.
Sometimes, we need to stick to it. For example, contracts, commitments, and caring for others are things that we need to accept.
However, when we find ourselves doing something that offers no benefit or value, we need to change direction. The sooner this is done, the easier it will be.
If you only dimly perceive where you want to go with your life, you will have little chance of getting there.
It's easier when you think about the options you have. Among the people I know, I've noticed that those who don't do that will end up wasting time.
The trick to planning your goals and reaching your dreams is to imagine you are already there and focus on how you feel about it.2
You can start anywhere to make a better future. The past doesn't matter. How you craft your future is what matters. How you change and improve yourself is what matters the most.
Here's an exercise to help you realize your power in making decisions.
Play through your life in your mind as if you were writing a screenplay of your life. But in this case, feel free to alter its progression.
As the director of the screenplay, you are in control, so you can use your imagination to direct it any way you desire.
Then, you'll discover how different your life could have been, such as working for a different company or choosing another profession that required you to relocate.
Your whole life might have been different if you had lived in a different town, met other people, and made other friends.
The conclusion you imagine might upset you. You might suddenly realize you made terribly wrong choices. Nothing can be done about that now, but getting in touch with this vision of your life can help you plot a more favorable course in the future.
There is a reason for the decisions we make throughout life. We choose our friends, our jobs, and the person we marry (or don't marry), all for obvious reasons.
When you find yourself in the worst of times and know you need to find a way to pull through for survival, remember to think of the options you may be overlooking.
When you become aware of your options, it's easier to deal with the trials and tribulations you encounter. Considering your options and visualizing the outcome will help you attain the future you desire.
Although we sometimes make mistakes in our judgment, it's always helpful to consider the benefits of each decision. Most of all, remember to value your safety, satisfaction, health, and comfort.
Was this meaningful to you? Tap
