Relisted November 5, 2026
Through this visual narrative, you'll see how to scatter the cremated remains of a loved one at sea with a peaceful and respectful ceremony and a serene farewell.
This illustrated story shows a comforting way to scatter cremated remains offshore from a boat.
I know this is a very difficult time for you if you have a relative who passed away. We all have a personal story, and if you know your loved one’s desires, you can feel comfortable that you are making the right choice.
For example, everyone in my family has been close to nature and cared for the environment. So they all wanted to have their ashes scattered over the ocean. That was their way of being returned to the Earth. A green burial, if you think of it that way.
There is no need for an urn if the ashes are going to be scattered anyway. Sometimes the ashes are sealed in a can. My aunt’s ashes were in a sealed plastic bag inside a black plastic container.
Doing It on Your Own
If you plan to scatter ashes over public water or public land, it would be wise to check local laws first because they are different in every state.
Some cities and states don’t allow scattering ashes anywhere. It’s important to know the rules to avoid a fine.
It is important to leave written directives for our family about our final wishes. My aunt's wishes were to be cremated and have her ashes scattered in the ocean.
I remember my father saying that he could not imagine decomposing in the ground with worms crawling through his remains. That may sound morbid, but that's how he explained it.
My aunt felt the same about being cremated. She once reminded me of how my father had spoken about it. Both my parents and my uncle wanted to be cremated.
Being Jewish, you might wonder why my aunt would want to be cremated. Some people tell me they consider cremation the same as when the Nazi's put our ancestors in gas chambers.
My grandparents were killed in the Holocaust. So, as a child of the Holocaust, I have a clear understanding of the comparison. Killing by gas or other means is murder. Jews were tortured alive. Cremation, on the other hand, is a clean process performed after death.
Even though we are Jewish and cremation is not acceptable by Jewish tradition, there is more to consider about one's feelings that needs to be respected.
Having lived to the age of 98, my aunt was the last of her generation to go. My sister and I are the only ones remaining. My aunt and uncle never had kids.
There were also no other living relatives related to my aunt because her only sister was married to a man for only a short time before he was killed in a concentration camp. They never had any time to have children.
As for my aunt and uncle, they wanted to travel. That was their life's goal after getting married. So, they decided not to have children.
My aunt wanted her friends to come to pay their respects. So I made plans with a funeral parlor to have a wake.
Family and friends attend a wake to chat and share memories of the deceased. It is also a time to comfort one another.
I also arranged the funeral. Since she was being cremated, the funeral was simply for the family to say their last goodbyes before the cremation.
We had a huge turnout at the wake. Many of my aunt's friends had already passed away, but many of my friends and my sister's friends knew my aunt and knew what a wonderful person she was. So, they came.
According to Jewish tradition, when someone dies, they are buried as soon as possible. There is no viewing and no wake, just a quick funeral.
I was surprised that one couple, who were good friends of my aunt’s, did not show up. I imagine it was because they were Orthodox and probably did not approve of the decision to be cremated. But I remember that they came to my uncle’s wake and funeral many years earlier. So, who knows what really happened.
My aunt had tried to tell me something about them when she was on her deathbed a few days before she passed. But she wasn’t in any condition to make much sense, and I didn’t know what she was trying to tell me.
I think she knew they would not want to show us any respect. Too bad that friends can’t look past that.
My sister and her husband had to return home to another state before I could arrange to carry out the last of my aunt’s requests to have her ashes returned to the Earth by scattering them over the ocean.
Being that I had to do this on my own, I needed to hire someone with a boat. You can find services or boat rentals by searching Google for “Scattering Ashes” or “Burial at Sea Services” and including your location.
Interview a few of them and ask questions. Some will do it alone for you, and others combine several families in one outing. You need to be sure you get what you expect.
Also, some services do the scattering for you, while others let you and your family do it.
Prices vary depending on the options you choose. The cost is higher when you include yourself in the ceremony, but you should check prices locally.
When I searched the Internet, I found someone who brings people out in his boat to perform the ceremony of a loved one. He had two options: Either go with him or have him do it for you at a smaller fee.
Since my sister had already flown back home, I took care of this myself. I chose the option to go on the boat and do the ceremony myself because I wanted to be sure my aunt was treated properly.
I arranged to meet the fellow I hired at the location where we would start our journey out to sea.
A storm was brewing, with thunder and lightning when I arrived in the morning. We had to wait since it would be dangerous to be out at sea with possible lightning.
Watching the storm over the water was very surreal. I got to see the various weather patterns. In some spots, the heavens were spewing heavy rain.
In other spots, I saw various cloud formations spinning around. Seeing lightning strike water was extremely amazing.
After an hour or so, the storm had passed. It was still cloudy and wet, but there was no thunder or lightning. So he told me, “We can leave now.”
As we traveled farther and farther out to sea, I could see the land formations that I knew so well, but never saw from that perspective before.
Eventually, the land was no longer in sight. He told me our local laws did not permit scattering ashes, so we needed to be out in international waters.
I asked him to take pictures of me with my camera while I performed the ceremony of scattering her ashes. And I must say, I was very pleased with how they turned out. He did a great job with the whole event, as he instructed me on what to do and how to do it.
He made a specially designed basket that is used to place the ashes in the water so the sea can capture them in a calming and surreal manner.
The first thing I did was open the plastic container that the crematorium provided with the ashes and place the ashes in the basket.
By the way, you don’t need to use a basket. If you want individual family members to release some ashes, one person at a time, you can do that with the container from the crematory. I did it that way years earlier for my mother.
If you wish, you can let everyone scatter the ashes simultaneously by placing the ashes in separate small containers. It’s just a matter of choice. Allowing each family member to pour some ashes is an excellent way to provide closure for everyone.
My aunt was proud of America, as it had been her safe haven ever since she escaped the Holocaust. So, I let her sit next to the American Flag for a while as I said my prayers. I just wanted to be with her for a while before saying goodbye.
The power of the prayer brought out the Sun momentarily.
The storm that had been through the area was making waves and tossing us around quite a bit as I prepared to let her into her final resting place.
I had to hold on with one hand while I held on to her with the other. It was her way of letting me feel the strength she had had throughout her long and difficult life.
I tied a rope to the basket before releasing her to the sea. The purpose of the rope was to pull back the empty basket after her ashes were free of it.
Scattering ashes is a clean, environmentally correct method of burial. Only ashes are returned to the Earth. That’s why I needed to pull back the basket after I was done.
I let her drift away from the boat. That was the hardest part of it, as I knew there was no turning back.
What was I thinking? There was no turning back anyway. Life is over. I will miss her. Many people will miss her. She was so special. She was kind and caring — no doubt why she lived so long.
As her ashes sank into the sea, I could feel the energy from the heavens as the powerful wind kicked up again.
The basket sank as I realized she would finally be at peace.
The winds started to kick up just as she sank beneath the sea. I could feel it at the top of my head. Almost like some energy force pulling up on my hair.
There she goes. She was peacefully becoming one with the world.
The last few years of her life were so difficult because her frail body was getting so weak; she lost all quality of life. The problem was that she was aware of that because her mind always remained strong.
Suddenly, the heavens opened up.
The clouds from that dreary storm had parted, and the light from the warm Sun glittered over the whole area where I had just released her to the world.
Now my aunt could be at peace. Now she could rest and be with the world, and with her husband. I know my uncle’s ashes were somewhere around there too.
Together they loved to travel and see the world. Now they can do that again. Only this time, they are closer than ever.
You can write a short eulogy to print on plastic cards for everyone who attends the wake or final services. I chose to write a poem for my aunt.
98 years of sunrises.
98 years of sunsets.
Tomorrow begins without me.
But I can still see.
I never gave up hoping.
I never gave up on thee.
I want for you to continue
to have your sun shine and be free.
If you got this far, let me know with a thumbs-up.
